Sanity is not statistical

People have been telling me lots about me lately. I'm not sure why, I haven't been going around quizing people about what they think of me. People have just been telling me things about me. And eccentric seems to be the top word to describe me. It's not been coming as an insult or, in the heat of an angry argument, but it's just how people have described me. It's said as matter of fact as 'you have brown hair' or 'you are short.' It seems that people can just as easily say 'you, Emil, are eccentric.' And it's made me think about the past, and how I've heard this many times before in different forms. My teacher used to tell me I was one 'who thought differently' and more recently a good friend of mine described me as 'unusual name, unusual character.' So it's got me thinking, am I mad? Do mad people know they are mad and does this explain why my hair sometimes makes me look like Freddie Boswell? So I'm consused now, and I've just done a sanity quiz http://www.youthink.com/quiz.asp?action=take&quiz_id=401 which concludes I am slightly odd. I don't however agree with this tests verdict, it's one of those stupid multiple choice ones that asks questions like how are you today? choose from a) 25 b) a baloon or c) a cunt. Finding a questionnaire on the net that really might judge your sanity is fruitless, I just spent half an hour doing so. So how do I find out if I am actually mad? I can't ask my friends, they'd either become yes men, or sarcastic, and either way I wouldn't be sure if I could believe them or not, being as cynical as I am. Maybe I shouldn't bother trying to find out, after all, I'm not that worried about being eccentric, and maybe even like it a tiny bit. It's not doing any harm I don't think.

I finished my book yesterday, Frank Skinners Autobiography. It feels sad putting down a good book, and it being an Autobiography, it's a bit like saying goodbye to a good friend. I really enjoyed that book, and have enjoyed any autobigraphy I have read. That's got me thinking about my taste in books. I'm also reading Ninteen Eighty-Four, the George Orwell classic, and I'm hating saying this but I'm not finding it that great. I can see why it's a classic, it's a political masterpiece, but it just seems to be about stuff that in a way is common sense. And if you really thought about it, you already knew the stuff in it. I suppose that in this way it is a parody of itself, and maybe I'm missing the point. Or that is the point. Either way, I'm not sure that masterpieces are for me. If you asked me to choose a fictional masterpiece, I'd choose 'The Wrong Boy' by Willy Russel, but thats's because it fits my criterior for a good book; it's light hearted easy to read and funny. I find 'classics' like Nineteen Eighty-four, and Catch-22 which I have also read to be good, but I could understand why they would appeal to knobs. Pompous people could discuss the bit between the lines. I'm made up for them.

I started making contingency plans this week for the rest of my life if Japan didn't welcome me. They including considering going to Australia and Canada. Any way, these contingency plans are on the back burner now, because it seems the Japanese may still be considering my application to teach there as they have extended their time to consider my application. Booty for them, cheers for leting me know. I've been worrying for weeks now about getting in or not. So much for Japanese slickness. I thought they would be such an organised organisation, that always met deadlines. Little did I know.